Had I known it was a landmark day, the end of a chapter per se, I probably would have reacted differently. But like most other landmarks in my career, it came smack dab in the middle of a seemly 'normal' hectic day like all others. I think this is true for most things in life that force us to either crumble or pivot. Had we known they were coming, we might try to avoid them completely. Experience has shown me that is partly why God allows them to happen. Because we all know what motivates change...a challenge. Without it, we would be content to stay put or even worse do things to avoid the pain all together. Challenges force us to move, when we don't want to. They offer us the chance to level up and bring a new you to the playing field. No challenge, no change. This is especially true as it pertains to spiritual growth and maturity in Christ. But most importantly, they allow God to be God, right in the middle of challenging circumstances, and do what only God can do. IF... we don't try to write the story ourselves. Let me explain how I know this.
The last baby I delivered was named Jeremiah. I don't think this was a coincidence. Jeremiah 29:11 (a very well- known scripture) tells us about God's character in the middle of a challenge. For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. This scripture was God speaking to the Israelites who were held captive in exile. Things looked bleak. But God told them, I know what I am doing. I'm going to restore you at just the right time. The bible tells us that faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance in what we do not see. (Hebrews 11:11) When you are in the middle of a serious storm, it can be hard to see how any good can come out of it. But God's character is not something we see; it should be something we know as we learn to trust Him in incrementally greater ways.
Corrie Ten Boom put it this way: "When a train goes through a tunnel and it gets dark, you don't throw away the ticket and jump off. You sit still and trust the engineer." If you aren't willing to sit still and let God lead you during serious challenges, you will never get to the desired destination which will always give you a better understanding of who God is and how much He loves you. Some people try to become the engineer. Some folks choose to jump off the train, even if the result is more pain. It takes bold faith to admit you are not in control and sit still to wait on God to write the rest of the story. That's why punctuation matters when it comes to your testimony. You have to remember who has the pen. Faith is simple, but not always easy.
So back to the day I realized life was about to pivot. The next two weeks that followed were pretty tough. There were enormous waves of doubt, fear, and feeling overwhelmed. Think Bearing Sea waves, like we see on "Deadliest Catch." The truth is it could have easily crushed me had I not already seen how God can work through very difficult circumstances so many times before. Having heroes of faith to inspire us can also help. One of those people for me was Kaetlin Jetton.
Kaetlin was a mother of 4 children, a beautiful soul, a colleague, a patient of mine and a friend. About two years ago, at the start of the pandemic, she was diagnosed with Leukemia; a pivot moment for sure. She is now with Jesus. Her celebration of life was exactly how I would want the punctuation mark to be at the end of my life on Earth....a Bonafide worship service! What stood out most, was how everyone described her as joyful until the very end. Even when there was no cure. Even when she felt immense pain. Immediately what struck me was that joy for a believer is clearly a choice. Her joy was a choice. "Joy is a decision, a really brave one, about how you are going to respond to life."-Wess Stafford. Why? Because happiness is both conditional and fleeting. Joy is when I choose to remember God's goodness regardless of my circumstance. I may not be able to control what happens to me in this life, but I do have the power to decide how to react to it. No one can take that from you. That is why the bible says, "The Joy of the Lord is your strength." Nehamiah 8:10.
Want to know the craziest realization? Kaetlin is experiencing the most joy she has ever known, and it took going through cancer to get her there. How can I say this? Because it led her straight to the arms of Jesus. And that makes it all worth it. Now before you say, "well, of course." Listen to what the Word says.
You make known to me the path of life; in your presence there is fullness of joy; at your right hand are pleasures forevermore. -Psalm 16:11
Kaetlin is in the presence of Jesus, where there is fullness of joy. For the believer, it doesn't get any better. But the path to get there only God can make known to us. Read that last sentence again in the light of your greatest struggle. You have to let him put the punctuation marks where they belong and resist the temptation to re-write the story. Sure, He requires our cooperation and maybe even bold decisions in faith. But this is the only way you get to see all the pleasures He has in store for you. Not just ultimately in Heaven but here on Earth. If you short circuit the journey, by trying to take control of the train, you will miss the blessings. You will see God's goodness and experience joy now, even in the middle of extreme hardship. The choice is mine and yours. Just wait on God. Command your soul like the Psalmist did in Psalm 27. "I believe I will look upon the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living! Wait for the Lord; be strong and let your heart take courage. Wait for the Lord!"
Kaetlin reminded us of all of this; her testimony is alive in probably more ways than we may ever know.
Often when I have delivered a baby for a believer, I will speak a particular verse over them during those last transitional moments when many mothers are contemplating giving up. I tell them, "Don't short circuit your joy, it is just on the other side of the pain. And it will be so worth it." It comes from Hebrews Chapter 12. This same verse is on the wall above my treadmill. Every morning when I physically endure a challenge, I remind my spirit of the same truth. Need a hero of faith to look to in those moments when choosing joy is hard and you want to quit? Look to Jesus.
"Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinners, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart."
The path of life can have some crazy twists and turns. That is what makes each story compelling and ultimately where heroes are made. But know this, a hero in the faith isn't someone who is braver than the ordinary man. They were just braver a few minutes longer. Long enough to let God do what only He can do. (Part 2)
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