Keep Your Sword at Your Side

This last week has really caused me to do a lot of reflecting on the past two years. I just found out that one of the two other doctors who covers SHHEC was leaving (she is actually gone now). That leaves myself and one other to cover the whole OB/Gyn service for the summer. We were promised some help, but even that proved disappointing. We pretty much will be taking every other night call and working a lot harder. At first I felt pretty overwhelmed. I cried, I yelled, but then I turned it over to God. He reminded me where we had been and where we are now. I moved my medical practice from Ft. Walton Beach Medical Center (taking call with 3-7 other docs at times) to Sacred Heart Hospital basically because God told me to. There definitely were practical reasons to do it but the decision was largely spiritual; I had no idea if I would succeed but I knew that God told me to move so I did. It was a faith thing; as a result the entire time God used the analogy in my own heart of the Israelites going to the promised land. They went because God told them to and it required a big step of faith into the River Jordan. They didn't know if the flood waters would overtake them and they would drown. They just knew they had to go.
What God accomplished through his people physically in the Old Testament is a picture of what he wants to accomplish in us spiritually now under the New Covenant. Of course he literally moved me to a new land. And I Thank God I have prospered here on many levels. But God has shown me gradually (mostly because of my thick headed-ness) he is trying to accomplish so much more. I never realized back then to get to my promised land I was going to have to escape some captivity and I might feel at times like I was wandering in the wilderness. His idea of promised land is not the same as yours and mine; His promised land is the Kingdom of God here on Earth. We get there by allowing God to remove those barriers to building his kingdom in our own lives and hearts; it will not simply be prospering me here on Earth.
So many times I've asked God, "If this is the promised land you asked me to go to, why has it been so hard...isn't it supposed to get easier?" Did you know when Joshua entered the promised land to take it he didn't have to fight just one king? No, not 5 kings. He had to battle 31 kings to claim the inheritance God had for him. Nehemiah 4:18 tells us that when they were building in that land "Those who carried materials did work with one hand and held a weapon with the other, and each of the builders wore a sword at his side as he worked." This is what my life has felt like ever since I got here....doing work but holding a sword and doing battle with the other. My dear friend always tells me that she feels like I'm on the front lines fighting spiritual warfare daily because of my unique ability to minister to people in my job; she has told me many times she is the Johnathon to my David...sharpening my sword for battle. (As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another. Prov 27:17) I've fought deception, evil influences, my own pride, shame, loss of prestige, death and illness in patients I cared deeply for, loss of income, increasing debt, less time with my family,feelings of inadequacy, unhealthy relationships, and recently the diagnosis of my brother with cancer.
This week I have realized though that God brought me here because through these experiences He and I are going to deal with some big issues, like insecurity and rejection. They need to get dumped. The truth is that my enemy knows what my God- potential is if I can still do my work and battle those things that have kept me in bondage. It is no wonder then that he makes me feel like I am at war and constantly throws things at me to challenge my weaknesses. If you are about to take hold of some significant spiritual ground that God has in store for you, you can bet your last dollar your enemy will be quick to attack! He doesn't care about your salvation as long as you stay bound and ineffectual for God! So keep your sword at your side...the Sword of the Spirit; who is your hedge to protect you from his attacks. (see my previous post!) My promised land inheritance is security in Jesus and I'm going to claim it. "Lord you have assigned my portion and my cup (who is Jesus by his body and blood); you have made my lot secure. The boundary lines (of the property you have set aside for me to claim in the kingdom of Heaven) have fallen for me in pleasant places, surely I have a delightful inheritance." Psalm 16