Staying Gospel Focused: Where Are Your Minas?

In my first post for of 2018, I talked about spiritually getting back on track. From a 'running' standpoint, I hadn't stopped running or even taken a left turn. But rather, I had allowed myself to become distracted and so rather than running a straight focused race, my recent course felt a bit wobbly.

In my first post I mentioned being a little discouraged by my book not being as successful as I had hoped. I believed God had given me a vision for my calling by writing this book.  In my mind, this bible study was a concentrated effort at sharing the gospel with women and hopefully seeing the fruits of transformed lives. I was hoping for a platform that would multiply. What I have come to realize, is that sometimes He will give you a picture of the vision, but the actual delivery is like a box with multiple parts that reads "assembly required". It's going to take lots of work.

Last week at church we heard from Luke 19 of the Parable of the Ten Minas. You can read it here. (https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Luke+19&version=NIV)  In the past when I read this passage I felt it was a parable about stewardship of our possessions. A mina was a unit of currency in Jesus' time.  In Matthew 25 Jesus spoke about The Parable of the Bags of Gold. I had interpreted them to be speaking about the same thing. In other words, how well do you steward the possessions, talents, and wealth that God has given you? Not all of us are given the same talents or wealth; however, we are expected to use what we have for kingdom building. But there is a big difference in these two stories. In the story about the bags of gold, the master begins by giving out differing amounts to his servants; they don't begin with the same amount. In the Parable of the Ten Minas, each of the ten servants are given the same amount.  Our pastor posed the question, what is something as believers that each of us are given as a deposit to invest? The answer is the Gospel.

I spent the next week really pondering that idea. I thought to myself, "sure, I share the gospel. I have even wrote a bible study about it." And then one morning as I was running on the treadmill, the Holy Spirit whispered to me, "How many times do you share the Gospel with a woman during a given week? How many women do you encounter in a typical week? I have already given you a bigger platform; now what are you going to do with it?. "As I thought about it, I realized that number had grown. I used to see 25-40 patients per day. But in the past several years, my daily schedule has continued to rise to the point where I see 40 people every day. It is so easy form me when I am busy to become task focused instead of gospel focused. Forty people is a lot of patients to move through and can easily become tiresome. Also, dealing with people is hard. I'm not always aware of everything going on their lives when they come through my doors. Making an effort to crack that surface takes time and work; something, that on some days, I feel short of.  I have realized in some aspects my busyness has distracted me from my spiritual focus; this is a great tactic of the enemy.  If he can't make you bad, he will make you busy.  More people equals a bigger platform for sharing the Gospel; I already have what I was looking for. And in that moment I distinctly heard the Lord say, "Stay in your lane. Do the work I've called you to do."
At the end of this parable Jesus tells them, "I tell you that to everyone who has, more will be given, but as for the one who has nothing, even what they have will be taken away."  In other words, being faithful day to day to share the deposit He has given, will automatically increase my ability to do so. He had already done that. My job is to stay gospel focused. 
 

Stay in Your Lane

     Inevitably as the year ends, like most individuals, I start to ponder what goals or resolve to have into the New Year. In the past, I have asked the Lord to provide me with a bible verse aligned with his desires for my heart for the coming year.  And in his typical fashion, he has never failed. I've had some great ones like, Philippians 4:8-9 (focusing on what's true/pure)  and Isaiah 43-18-19. (God doing a new thing), Phil 4:11(being content in all circumstances) They have often been uplifting, encouraging, and exhorting. But this year, the Lord had a message for me I didn't fully see coming.

Lots of things changed in my life toward the end of 2017. My two sons both went to college leaving Greg and I with the proverbial 'empty nest'. However, the nest was promptly filled with two rescue pups from Alaqua that were full time. The entire rhythm of the house changed. Until August, Greg and I would wake up each morning, drink our coffee and read daily scriptures out loud together. This had been our practice for many years, but in 2017 we vowed to read them out loud to each other. It afforded great conversation and spiritual growth.  But once the dogs came, our routine fell apart.  Further, some of my close personal relationships ended or changed in ways I can't explain. There were personal conflicts. Work was busier than ever and all this slowly consumed my attentions.

I also published my first bible study in 2017 (Finding Your Worth in Christ: a study of Mary Magdalene)  https://www.facebook.com/beachstork/  It was the culmination of years of listening to the Lord and my experiences ministering to women.  I was sure it was part of my calling to write this book. So of course I expected to see God use it mightily for his glory. That wasn't the issue. It was that I wanted to see it with my own eyes. I needed to know that others appreciated my gift as well.  However, my lofty expectations were not met. And if I am honest, it made me sad. "Now what, God?", I asked. I began to feel like I didn't know my place in my spiritual race. Ironically the book was written to set women free from spiritual strongholds, but I felt myself being pulled right back into some of my own.  My soul was left with an emptiness and longing for both connection and the Word. I think deep down, I knew I wasn't where I needed to be. As Christmas approached, I set my resolve to press into the Lord for the holiday season. I actually deliberately avoided the hectic-ness and fluff of the season.

As I was flipping through my IG, I came across this quote: "Don't waste your gift because you are too busy trying to get others to notice your gift. Stay in your lane. Live your purpose."

 I saved it and moved on. But the Holy Spirit kept whispering to me, "Stay in your lane." I knew there was something I was supposed to deposit from this. And then the Lord brought this verse to my remembrance:

Galatians 5:7-8 " You were running a good race. Who cut in on you to keep you from obeying the truth? That type of persuasion does not come from the one who calls you."

And in an instant, the realization that I had allowed myself to get off track hit like a ton a bricks. I have allowed myself to be distracted in more ways than one and my enemy knew it. It wasn't that my calling had changed. I had taken my eyes off of it. Distractions like busyness, seeking acceptance, pride, and comparison all pulled me off course.  As Paul exhorts us in Hebrews 12, we must "throw off everything that hinders us and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us."   For 2018, I need to re-focus by very simply eliminating distractions that don't serve my purpose/calling, especially those that lead to sin. So how do I  do that? Well, the Lord was faithful to also provide that wisdom. Another quote soon appeared :

"Do you know why race horses wear blinders? Because they have to focus on running their own race. Learn to do the same." 

I have some ideas about how to do this. First, is to discipline myself back into daily reading of the Word. Greg and I began afresh this morning reading aloud to each other; this year we are choosing the ESV edition. We use http://oneyearbibleonline.com/, which is an easy format for reading through the entire bible in a year.  I will also wait upon the Lord to reveal more ways to re-focus in 2018. In the meantime, I have felt Spirit-led to resurrect this blog. Because when I'm 'Running on Faith', I know I'm in my God given lane.