Learning to Harmonize

Last night was our church's Night of Worship for Palm Sunday. I sang with the choir, which is not unusual for me since I have been a part of the choir about 1 1/2 years now. But last night my role within it changed and it set me up to hear a word from God.

I have always loved to sing ever since I was a child. My great grandmother used to care for me after school at her house. We played all sort of make believe games, card games, and watched her soap operas. But the thing I loved the most was singing solos while she played the piano. In essence, she taught me to sing. I think I hold it so fondly in my heart because that grandmother was one of the true godly influences that I had in my life and the time I spent with her truly brought me joy in what was otherwise a tumultuous childhood. Singing solos at the piano also fit right in with my developing personality...I liked to be front and center. I liked commanding other peoples attention. What I didn't realize until about 30 years later was that it was rooted in the insecurities that were born out of the same childhood.

I have always sang melody. Which in a choir generally translates to singing the soprano part. Again, remember...taking the lead is what I do best. For 10 years I sang with the praise team at my church. In all honesty, I liked being on the stage and reflecting back I know there were parts of my heart that were not in the right place. But I did enjoy it, until about two years ago. After being humbled, my hearts desired changed. (God will use your circumstances to accomplish this!)  I joined the choir at my new church because I was fighting to keep the things in life that brought me joy,  but really had no desire to step outside of that. Until very recently. Our choir had auditions for lead worshipers. I decided to audition. I was told that what they needed and what was felt would better suit me was an alto position. Say what? In essence, if I could master this then maybe I could have a place in that group. At first, I was hurt and defeated. Initially I decided I didn't want to do it. Maybe I didn't get it because God didn't want that for me anymore in this season of life. But at the same time I was reading about God assigning the duties of the tabernacle. The Israelites didn't get to choose their duty...it was assigned. The Merarites were assigned the duties of carrying the crossbars, beams, and tent pegs. They didn't get to carry the Ark, they carried the supports for worship. Maybe God was calling me to do the same. I decided I would try because with wisdom has come the realization that usually when my pride gets hurt, that might just be exactly where God wants me.

Fast forward to Night of Worship. I showed up and went straight to my usual place in the Soprano section. Almost immediately, I was moved to the altos. Okay, here we go. This week our pastors asked us to pray that Jesus was give us a greater revelation of himself. A face to face divine encounter that would in some way show us more of who he is. Obviously I was sensing a theme here with God because that is exactly what my focus has been and what the Spirit has been drawing me to. (More on this to come.)  As I sang, I had to strain my ear to listen closely to the alto parts and follow accordingly. In that moment the Holy Spirit whispered to me. " This is right where I want you. If you want a greater revelation of me, this is exactly what you are going to have to do. Stop taking the lead, press your ear into me with your worship, and LISTEN." It all came full circle. Just a few hours earlier I had been reading my Priscilla Shirer book (Discerning the Voice of God) this passage: "He's in you. This means that listening to Him is an exercise in hearing from within--not being directed by external stimuli that divert your attention away from His direction."

I don't know if this exercise will realistically translate into stepping out of the choir into a lead worshiper position. Nor am I absolutely sure this is what God wants for me. But I absolutely realized that with humility comes a readiness to listen. Training my inner ear to hear his voice is definitely worth the practice and certainly seems to be in God's plan right now. So for awhile it appears I will be singing alto. It appears that developing harmony is part of my spiritual growth.
"May our dependably steady and warmly personal God develop maturity in you so that you get along with each other as well as Jesus gets along with us all. Then we’ll be a choir—not our voices only, but our very lives singing in harmony in a stunning anthem to the God and Father of our Master Jesus!" Romans 15:5-6 MSG.

Friend of God

My family and I have been watching the History channel series, "The Bible." I hope you are too!  Although meant to be a dramatic representation of the scripture rather than a literal depiction, it has been very entertaining and enjoyable to watch. So far we have covered old testament characters, namely Abraham, Moses, and Samson. Once again this year I am reading through the One Year bible online in the New King James version. Not coincidentally I am being refreshed on the actual scripture at the same time I have been watching this dramatic representation. By watching the stories dramatically on screen, I have really been struck by those people who received personal visitations from God or his messengers. One can only imagine what they felt, and how their relationships with Him changed at that point.

The Bible only describes two people as being "a friend of God." They were Abraham and Moses. That's it. I realized it might be important to understand some of their qualities if we desire to further our own relationship with God. Trust me, I am not taking this aspiration lightly. There is a popular contemporary Christian song that echoes, "I am a friend of God, he calls me friend." (BTW, my best friend hates this song!) But she might have point. To sing about it so glibly as if this is an easy feat, does diminish the awe we should have for the matter.  Of everyone in the Bible only two achieved that title. And frankly, it is an achievement. You see, son-ship/daughter-ship of  the King is something we RECEIVE with our salvation. But friendship or relationship with God is something you have to ACHIEVE... you have to work at it. You have to pursue a knowledge of who He is and what makes his heart happy. And to love him, you have to live what makes his heart happy. This is true relationship with God. (John 15:14)

Let's start with Abraham. I was most struck by his willingness to sacrifice his treasure, Issac. In fact, while watching this scene in the t.v. series, I cried. I have asked myself on several occasions during my faith walk if I am willing to lay down my dreams and my vision of my future to follow God. It's hard. But it's worth it. Abraham walked for three days before he reached the place of sacrifice (which God said he would show him/he didn't tell him beforehand). What did God "show him" during those three days? Did he show him that in that same place God himself would later sacrifice his own son, Jesus, (who ultimately was a descendant of Abraham) for all of mankind? We may never know. But I believe that Abraham knew God's nature because he already had a strong relationship with him and heard his voice. He feared the Lord, but he already knew goodness and his mercy. He seemed to have no doubt that the Lord would provide what was necessary to keep his promises even when things looked pretty dismal in  the natural. (Remember he gave him Isaac). I'm trying really hard to remember this for myself in my current season of life. "There has never been the slightest doubt in my mind that the God who started this great work in you would keep at it and bring it to a flourishing finish on the very day Christ Jesus appears." Phil 1:5-7 Maybe this is exactly what helped Abraham believe God. And the bible tells us, his belief in God was credited to him as righteousness.

Moses not only was called friend but he also earned another title in scripture. Numbers Ch 12 tells us that he was "the most humble person on the face of the Earth." This is pretty amazing considering that he bible also tells us in the same chapter when Miriam tries to oppose him, that he is only one God spoke to face to face. Not too many people can say that...even the mega-church preachers.

“Hear now My words:
If there is a prophet among you,
I, the Lord, make Myself known to him in a vision;
I speak to him in a dream.Not so with My servant Moses;
He is faithful in all My house.I speak with him face to face,
Even plainly, and not in dark sayings;
And he sees the form of the Lord.

This passage really struck both Greg and myself. It is one to really ponder and meditate over. It seems to me, the more God asks you to grow in your faith, and walk closer to him, the more you are going to have to experience humility. That might look different for every person. But I can say it has definitely been true for me. But further, it seems the more you grow, the more you seek humility. Why? I think the more you know God, the more you are in awe of him. Fear of the Lord (awe) is the beginning of wisdom. Most people who came "face to face" with the Lord or one of his messengers, "fell down as dead". They were so overwhelmed by his majesty. The more you experience his presence manifest in your life, the less you seek to promote yourself. Not to say that you won't experience promotion if you know God. In fact, the more you strive to please him, the more you position yourself for his favor. "Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up." James 4:10

 I'm starting a new book by Priscilla Shirer, "Discerning the Voice of God." I feel like I was drawn to it because I have been turning over these characters in my mind. And frankly, I want to hear from the Lord. So I realized that I have to position myself to do so. Looking to his word is always the best place to start. I'm excited to see who we get to watch on the next installment tonight.