The Best Gifts You Ever Receive

Christmas is almost upon us!  Some well organized types have long since finished their shopping. The majority of us busy folks are entering the week of last minute scrambling to find the perfect touches for gifts for our loved ones. I do love this time of year because the overall mood of the season is hopeful and the heart is turned toward thinking of the needs of others. I believe this in itself lends a special quality to Christmas gifts and distinguishes them from other types of gifts given throughout the year.
At work we reminisced about being children and trying to figure out what was inside those gifts under the tree. Some of us were "peekers" and others didn't dare. Have you ever received a gift inside a gift? I'm referring to clever packaging designed to conceal what really lies underneath; the recipient opens the gift only to find another box inside with another gift to unwrap. I'm here to tell you that this how God wrapped his most precious Christmas gift! There is a unique gift inside the 'gift of Christmas' for each one of us.
The obvious gift at Christmas for all of us is Jesus Christ. He was in fact a gift. John 3:16 tells us, "For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only begotten Son so whoever  believes in him will not perish but have everlasting life." Salvation is a gift. It is not something you can earn by being good. Why? Because none of us is good when compared to a holy God.
"For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God -not by works, so that no one can boast. For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do." (Ephesians 2:8-10)
The second half of this scripture reveals the 'gift inside the gift' that God has for you. Once you accept the freely given gift of salvation from God, he has something special handpicked inside just for you. This is called your "Spiritual Gift" and is only given to believers who choose to accept and open the gift of Jesus in their lives. You have a calling on your life and God has particular plans specifically prepared for you in advance to do. "..for God's gifts and his call are irrevocable."(Romans 11:29)  The unequivocal truth is this: you will only be fully satisfied in this life when you are fully executing your God given gift. I think this is also in part why this time of year can be so hard for some folks and depression hits an all time high during the holidays; their hearts are longing for significance and know they should have it, but they haven't opened their gift of Jesus to find it. Without him, the holiday is missing something quite substantial and ultimately this includes your personal reason for being here on Earth.
Spiritual gifts take many different forms but all are used for God's plans:
"Now to each one the manifestation of the Spirit is given for the common good. To one there is given through the Spirit a message of wisdom, to another a message of knowledge by means of the same Spirit,  to another faith by the same Spirit, to another gifts of healing by that one Spirit, to another miraculous powers, to another prophecy, to another distinguishing between spirits, to another speaking in different kinds of tongues,and to still another the interpretation of tongues. All these are the work of one and the same Spirit, and he distributes them to each one, just as he determines." (1Corinthians 12) This passage tells us spiritual gifts include things like the gift of healing, prophecy, discernment, administration, encouragement, mercy, serving, and teaching.(Romans 12)  When you first discover what your gift is, it is like a tiny ember or spark inside of you. It has to be developed without fear into what God fully intended.
"For this reason I remind you to fan into flame the gift of God, which is in you through the laying on of my hands. For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline." (2nd Tim 1:5-7)
The number one song on the Billboard chart during this week before Christmas is "Firework" by Katy Perry. Of course I don't approve of how her video and its worldly message has warped what ultimately is one of God's wonderful truths; but this is fairly typical of Satan who has tried to defile the gift of Christmas since that first silent night in the manger. However, the message behind the song is what got me thinking about the flame inside of all of us and how it is tied to the best gift you ever got for Christmas. If you close your eyes, and listen to this song with the notion of your spiritual gift in mind, one could see why this song is so popular especially this time of year.
One part of the lyrics are this.."maybe your reason why all the doors are closed, so you can open one that leads you to the Perfect Road." "But small is the gate and narrow is the road that leads to life, and only a few find it." (Matthew 7:14) Want to be fully satisfied and know that you are living out your specifically chosen purpose here on Earth? It's as simple as accepting a gift. You are a firework meant to shine in a very dark world. "For you were once darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Live as children of light." Ephesians 5:8 Merry Christmas and may your New Year shine brightly from within!
Katy Perry "Firework"

"The TALK"

Lately I have really been feeling the burden of attempting to raise two godly sons in today's world. I look around me and the statistics and behaviors I observe are discouraging. Recently I opened Yahoo to find that 4 in 10 people say that "the concept of marriage is obsolete"; 6% of families are live-in couples with children who opt never to get married and marriage itself has hit an all time low of 52% for people over 18 yo. Now add to that the responsibility of trying to teach children about sexual purity and waiting until marriage to have sex and one could see why Christian parents might feel like David attacking Goliath. But remember it only takes one well planted 'stone' of truth to tackle the Devil's schemes. I view my responsibility to educate my sons as both physical and spiritual and I'm going to make the case for both here. I'm hoping that by writing these words on paper (with the wonderful tool of backspace when needed) I'll have given some deliberate thought to the conversation that will ultimately take place. Yep, that's right...my boys have asked me to have "THE TALK." (Cricket, cricket.....)
My first comment to parents is this: do not rely on others to educate your children about sexual relations. I never got "the talk" with my parents and I wish that I had. It might have saved me a lot of heartache. Further, I don't believe that God holds us responsible for our childrens' decision making; everyone individually is accountable to God for that. However, he does hold you responsible for how well you equipped them to fight the battle. Focus on the Family can help with this. There are books that are geared to be age appropriate that will teach your children the logistics of sexual relations. The recommendation is that one gives them the book and leaves it in their room to read at their discretion; I did this and found them both reading the books alone. It is just as important to follow up on the introduction of such material and let them know you can answer questions. Next you have to provide the context for the logistics.  I realize this will sound really strange to a lot of folks (cue DC Talks' Jesus Freak) but I believe before you even have the 'talk' you have to frame their thinking at a very young age about relations. A few years ago I was introduced to the concept of "courtship dating" and it has framed discussions in our home. This paradigm subscribes to the notion that there is no need to date until one is ready to take a spouse and is at the stage of life to assume all the responsibilities that go with marriage. Frankly, dating is not a biblical concept and only presents opportunities for temptation. The fact that I even subscribe to such thinking now is a true testimony to what God has done in my life; when I was a teenager I thought I had to have a boyfriend and I made lots of stupid decisions that could have cost me my future. I thank God all the time that he protected me from myself and preserved his plan for my life; in fact I consider my parenting an act of God towards my boys and is an amazing part of my testimony considering the childhood that I had.
Here are the two major issues that I feel should be stressed in 'the talk':
1. God's rules are for us not against us. God is not the eternal 'party pooper'. He invented sex and he wants it to be enjoyed within the right context. God gives us rules to protect us. If you step outside of the boundaries provided by God's word, then you are not safe and provide easy access for the enemy to step in and try to de-rail God's plan for your life. I plan to use an analogy from LOST since my family are huge fans of the t.v. show. God set up the pilons (his commandments)  for our protection; his security system is the Holy Spirit who convicts us that sex before marriage is wrong. If you disable the security system and go outside of the pilons there is a large smoke monster waiting. It is not safe! Outside God's protection is heartache, disease, sin which causes guilt and ultimately separates us from God. God's word tells us there is no temptation that cannot be overcome and more importantly God will always provide a way out. This is the physical nature of the talk besides well...the logistics.
2. Your first love is very important. Marriage, and particularly the intimacy that involves sexual relations within the context of marriage, is designed to be a physical representation of  the union between Christ and the church. "For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh. This is a profound mystery- but I am talking about Christ and the church." (Ephes 5:31-32) When you have sex with someone, in some part you become one with them. Something about sexual relations sticks to our being; "flee from sexual immorality, all other sins a person commits are outside the body but whoever sins sexually sins against their own body." (1st Corinth 6:18) Premarital sex is like duct tape; if you keep sticking it to something new over and over again it loses its stickiness. Therefore when the time comes for one to unite in marriage, the union isn't as God intended. Your first love is important, both physically and spiritually. The Church is the Bride of Christ and one day will be united with Jesus in the most intimate way when he returns. Our enemy is doing everything he can to attack this union and make it something that believers cannot relate to and therefore don't treat as important. If you don't see yourself as the Bride of Christ, then you won't act like one. Our enemy is attacking by attempting to:
1. Destroying the entire concept of marriage and what constitutes a family.
2. Defile the Bride of Christ with sexual sin among believers.
3. Derail the church with other loves so that our union with him will be 'less sticky' when he returns; these include things like prosperity gospel, not preaching about sin, eliminating the cross because it is offensive, or seeking to entertain rather than to worship.
I don't think it is a stretch to say that God puts emphasis on 'your first love'; in Revelation all the churches who are not found palatable to God "chose to forsake their first love" and adhered themselves to other truth before Jesus' return.This could be a whole other blog post...and probably will about what I am observing as churches attempt to straddle being in this world but not of it.
Well there it is...the talk in outline form. I feel like I'm about to give a briefing again in the Air Force. Only this one has eternal consequences. Wish me luck! And for all you Christian parents out there who struggle with the uncomfortable subject of sexuality in today's world, remember David. One stone... the tool in his hand that he was familiar with. When he slayed the giant that seemed impossible to tackle, just like when we raise up godly sons and daughters as a shining example.. then "we come against the enemy in the name of the Lord Almighty...and the whole world will know there is a God in Israel." 1st Samuel 17

Cultivating Thankfulness

In preparation for Thanksgiving I've really been trying to cultivate a spirit of thankfulness. This practice takes deliberate effort because as Americans we live in a world that cultivates the exact opposite... discontentment. Why would I say such a thing? Just look at this stack of catalogs I have received thus far for Christmas shopping. I'm ashamed to say they actually started arriving back in October but hit full force after November 1st. Catalogs are no more than glossy books with pages and pages of stuff all to make you discontent with what you  already have. Fundamentally this is what advertisers are banking on. They know as Americans,   we have a growing sense of purposeless, and the majority of us try to fill this void with stuff. All the while telling ourselves, "If I just had __________, then I would be satisfied." Somewhere in  our hearts we know this is not where contentment lies. This week when we sit down at our Thanksgiving table, listing what we are thankful for, it will the relationships, family and basic provisions that are at the top of the list...not  our stuff. God recently gave me one of those 'a-ha' moments for cultivating thankfulness all year round and he used the mail to do it.

When most Christians talk about our relationship to material things they will quote scripture from Matthew 6 with most of the emphasis on where we should store up treasure and that we cannot serve two masters.

"Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy, and where thieves break in and steal.  But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moths and vermin do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal.  For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.
 The eye is the lamp of the body. If your eyes are healthy, your whole body will be full of light.  But if your eyes are unhealthy, your whole body will be full of darkness. If then the light within you is darkness, how great is that darkness!
“No one can serve two masters. Either you will hate the one and love the other, or you will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and money."

God revealed to me the key to all of this may actually lie in the middle verse which is often skipped when quoting this passage. The key is keeping our eyes healthy; the key to cultivating thankfulness is where you look! 
If Satan cannot affect your salvation, then his next goal is to affect your impact for the kingdom of Christ. His primary focus for the saved Christian becomes making us ineffective and stealing our joy/ability to live an abundant life in Christ.  In other words, the enemy wants to help you cultivate discontentment. If he can keep you focused on your self and your own problems, you are less likely to see the need around you. Subsequently, you are less available to be used by God. Like I wrote in my previous post, often to be more thankful simply requires looking at the problems and needs of those around you. "Generosity is a way of telling the subconscious: I already have ENOUGH. If you reach out your hand to help others, you know you're coming from a place of sufficiency."
My enemy is constantly sending me catalogs of what I don't have. If I could give them  a few titles they could be periodicals like:
1. The People Who Don't Respect Me
2. The Patients who Chose Someone Else
3. The Employee Who Takes Advantage of You
4. The Family Members Who Push Your Buttons

Who would want to look a those catalogs? But that was exactly what my eyes focused on, due to past insecurities that would filter the events of life and attach a context; knowing my vulnerabilities, the enemy would shove one of those titles right under my nose. God spoke to me in a quiet voice one morning as I listened to a sermon on Matthew 6. He suggested, "It's a simple as that, just don't look. Don't look at what the enemy says you don't have, focus on what you do have in Christ." The interesting thing is I've discovered the two are connected. The more I keep my eyes focused on Christ, the less I look to fill the 'voids' in my life with stuff. Now don't get me wrong, this is not an instantaneous thing. That's why I said we have to cultivate thanksgiving; it takes work and constant attention. By training our eyes where to look (and for me this might need to be like a horse with a set of blinders!), the goals of this scripture will fall in to place. Less insecurity means less need to acquire treasure here. Less focus on ourselves, means more ability to store up treasure in Heaven. Less behavior of filling emotional voids with stuff, means we are not a slave to a particular lifestyle but a slave to Jesus Christ. It is all connected. "For the one who was a slave when called to faith in the Lord is the Lord's freed person; similarly the one who was free when called, is Christ's slave." (1st Corinth 7:22)
This week I am determined to cultivate Thankfulness. At the top of the list is my relationship with the one who died to make me free; "So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed." (John 8:36). Happy Thanksgiving everyone!

More than You Can Handle

I have some people close to me who currently are in the midst of turmoil. One could say they are in the middle of one of "life's storms"...however the magnitude of what some of them are dealing with is like being in a dingy in the middle of the Gulf of Mexico during Hurricane Opal...without a paddle. Big storm, big problems. In my last post I spoke about my fatigue in dealing with my own problems; essentially, I was sick of being consumed with my self. So many times we call things tribulations that are really annoyances. Want some perspective? Take a look around you and see what other people are dealing with; suddenly, your perspective will change and you'll be thankful for what you have instead of focusing on what you don't.
One of my friends was really struggling and someone tried to comfort her by telling her, "Remember, God will never give you more than you can handle!" I was standing near and immediately I felt my hair stand on end. I know the person meant well, but I despise when Christians use this expression. Why? Because, frankly this is just not true and  further is not based on scripture at all. Telling someone this only adds to their defeat. It either makes them feel like they are inept and that's why they can't handle what they obviously should or it leads them to the conclusion that God does not care about them and that is why they are feeling overwhelmed by their circumstances.

Paul tells us that "the temptations in your life are no different from what others experience. And God is faithful. He will not allow the temptation to be more than you can stand. When you are tempted, he will show you a way out so you can endure." (1st Corin 10:13) This scripture lets us know that when we are faced with difficult situations in life, or we feel like we are in way over our heads, our enemy will always be there to offer us a short cut or a way out that leads to sin. God will never allow us to endure any temptation  that we cannot overcome, if we turn to him for the solution. Paul is telling us that we have a choice in any situation...to believe God or not. What is factual is that we will be given situations in life that are more than we can handle. If you could handle everything in life on your own, you would have no need for a Savior. You would have no need for Jesus.

This leads me to my final thought. Trials are where the rubber meets the road. When life is going well, what we believe to be true is not tested. But when life overwhelms us, like a rogue wave on the ocean, this is when your theology becomes your reality. Trials are necessary to test our faith...do you really believe that God uses all things toward your good? (Romans 8:28) Do you really believe that nothing can separate you from the love of Christ?(Romans 8:39) In other words, do you really believe what you say you do? Or is that just what you want others to believe about you? The reality of life is that you are not fooling anyone by telling them what you think they want to hear.  Fiery trials bake the fake right out of us. That is what God is after. He is seeking authentic believers who 'know what they know' because they have experienced God coming through for them time and time again.
"Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance.  Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.  But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. That person should not expect to receive anything from the Lord. Such a person is double-minded and unstable in all they do." (James 1)  The spiritual paradox about the rogue waves of life is this: the more you keep your eyes focused on Jesus the smaller the waves become and the less effect they have on your person. What once would have knocked you off your feet in the past, can eventually feel like a breaking tide around your ankles. Tribulations become annoyances.

She Has My Back

I need a vacation.  I'm just going to go ahead and admit it; for the truth is, I already did, out loud, and I spiritually suffered the consequences. (I should have read my previous post about coyotes!)  I've been telling those close to me for quite some time.  I worked really hard this past summer, taking call every other night for 4 months, and bearing the extra work load. I continued my running/exercise regime despite this to maintain my physical fitness and still managed to complete a triathlon Labor Day weekend.  The fatigue I was feeling was more than physical though. I've done a lot of work with God this year; we've wrestled out some big issues in my life. I've fought a lot of spiritual battles and in some cases gained some real ground in my promised land. God is bringing me out of my Egypt..my captivity of insecurities, hurts and hang-ups.  But something in my spirit was growing weary. I began to ask myself, "When are these issues going to be under my feet? Why am I fighting the same battles over and over?" It seemed like every time I gained ground, my enemy was right there to throw something new at me or the Lord pointed out something new I needed to work on. Ephesians 6 talks about the spiritual armor we clothe ourselves with when we fight battles. They include the belt of truth, breastplate of righteousness, shoes of peace, shield of faith, and helmet of salvation. Pretty well covered from the front, when you can see an attack coming.

"Remember what the Amalekites did to you along the way when you came up out of Egypt. When you were weary and worn out, they met you on your journey and attacked all of you who were lagging behind; they had no fear of God." Deut 25:17-19


The physical burden has lifted now with two new physicians rotating into the call schedule, but the whole process left me physically tired and mentally weary. I recently discovered that this is when you are most vulnerable to an attack you didn't see coming. Out of no where a spirit of discouragement and frankly evil engulfed me from behind; thoughts came into my mind completely not characteristic of me with a strong inclination to sin. It is hard to describe, but in the moment, it felt like my fear of the Lord left me. Now please don't misunderstand me. When you are saved, you are sealed under the day of Redemption. No spirit can get in you; but they sure can get on you. They can evoke feelings and emotions. It scared me to see them rise up quickly and so out of character for me. Of course my enemy was eager to add shame to my insult. This is when you must fall back into what you know God's word says, instead of what you feel.  Knowing the danger of where this would lead if not stopped abruptly I immediately went to the one person I know has my back spiritually speaking. She hemmed me in.

This is why it is imperative that every Christian has an accountability partner. Although difficult to admit what was happening in my spirit, I knew it had to be done. Accountability requires face to face one on one interaction. It is the only way you can really get to the heart of an issue. When Jacob wrestled his issues with God, ultimately changing his name to Israel (Genesis 32) it says he was alone, and "got face to face with God and lived." I really believe this is why the world is moving so much to texting and social networks for interaction...No accountability. People will write/text things that they would never say in person. Further, if I surround myself with such communication as my primary method of dealing with my issues, then I never really have to get "face to face" with them or God for that matter. In the presence of God we become immediately aware of how holy He is and sinful we really are. Isaiah immediately upon being ushered in his vision into God's presence, cried "Holy, holy,holy" followed by "Woe to me. I am ruined! I am a man of unclean lips."
Accountability partners have to be someone you trust implicitly, who loves the Lord and knows his word, but is not your spouse. They really should be of the same gender and unafraid to speak truth into your life. Mine just so happens to be my best friend and I am unspeakably grateful for her. I immediately felt better after talking to her. That is exactly what is supposed to happen. Our enemy wants you to believe that if you really admit what is in your heart to God or another person, you won't be accepted or forgiven. Worse yet, like Jacob, we think it could be the death of us, if we really had to face it. Maybe not physical death, but the death of our dignity, what we want people to think of us, relationships or hope. The truth is exactly the opposite; your soul won't find rest until you get face to face with God. Sometimes he uses other people to do this. "As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another." Prov 27:17.
The second half of the scripture is really where the key lies. "When the Lord your God gives you rest from all the enemies around you in the land he is giving you to possess as an inheritance you shall blot out the name of the Amalekite."
There is no shame in being weary; God knows this happens to us. That is why his word says, "So let's not allow ourselves to get fatigued doing good. At the right time we will harvest a crop if we don't give up or quit." (Gal 6:9 MSG) As long as we don't quit and allow the enemy to overtake us you will get your inheritance. God showed me this is why the attack really comes. It's not because you were weak in your faith or tired. It is because the enemy knows you are about to get your inheritance due and when you do, the shame won't be anywhere but squarely on his head. So for the meantime, I am counting down the days until my vacation which is soon coming and eternally thankful for my best friend who has hemmed me in until I rest in what God is about to deliver.

First Annual Run For New Life 5K - a divine puzzle

I've been so busy lately that I've finally gotten the chance to sit down and write about what culminated in my life to be a rather exciting event. The planning for it felt much like a wedding, with so many small details to be looked over. The day it arrived was much like the same type of celebration and then it was over. Those close to me know I'm referring to my first endeavor as a race director. This blog is about the First Annual "Run For New Life 5K" which was held on October 2nd. It was an incredible success with over 170 participants. So much went into the orchestration of this event; two years of life, tears, and planning. And then it was over. I asked myself, "Now what?" The answer:  Remember! Remember what the Lord did. I believe this is really the purpose for keeping a journal, even an on-line one, in the Christian faith. It is designed to testify and help us remember. The Lord knows we have a tendency to forget if we don't and your enemy will try to take it back. So this is my attempt to summarize the amazing tapestry of this event as the Lord took individual lives, heartaches, struggles, and faith and wove them together into something beautiful.
In one of his most famous lines, Forest Gump prophetically stated, "Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you're going to get."  Well, Forest, I'm here to tell you that God's plan is far more organized than that (and hopeful...since I really don't like the strawberry cream ones) and he sees it much more like a huge jig-saw puzzle. The catch is, only the Lord has the benefit of seeing the top of the box revealing the masterpiece that is created when all the pieces are laid down just right. In showing me this vision, I believe I gained a small insight into what the "Lord's will" looks like as it pertains to human choice.

To make this clearer, I'm going to dump out the pieces and start laying them down one at a time.

 
1. Leanne- My friend Leanne lost her daughter Maitlyn at 19 weeks gestation. Leanne taught me that faith can move mountains. The mountains are events in life that otherwise would become huge obstacles to us in our walk with God and believing what he says is true. Having a child die is a mountain. Leanne chose to believe God. She committed to run 19 races in 2009 in honor of Maitlyn's life here on Earth. In the process she showed countless others that they can keep running in faith too.

2. Lindsey- My friend Lindsey lost her daughter Gabrielle at 22 weeks pregnancy, the week before Christmas. Lindsey and her husband, Sean believed God. They committed at her birth that Gabrielle's life would be about why God sent his Son as a baby to Earth to ultimately die; several people came to salvation at Gabrielle's memorial service. How many of us can say without a doubt that we personally have brought people to Christ? Lindsey showed that all created life is here for a divine purpose and God won't take us home until that is accomplished.

3. Lauren-My friend Lauren discovered that her unborn son Jonathon had a chromosomal abnormality that would not be compatible with life. In a world that encouraged her to terminate his life and negate his purpose, Lauren believed God. She created a blog entitled Jonathon's Journey which honestly revealed the struggles that all of us go through in our faith, especially when the road is hard. Lauren's openness as she poured out her heart to God showed the rest of us it is okay to do the same. Her story was featured in the Northwest FL Daily News.  The day Jonathon was born her blog had thousands of hits to it, revealing that her faith walk along Jonathon's journey was more than healing to Lauren; it was healing for all of us. Lauren showed us all that our faith although intimate is not meant to stay private; it needs to be shared to fulfill God's fully intended purpose.

How do these women and the piece of the puzzle that they hold fit together? You see, at any point they could have chosen not believe God. God's perfect will is the picture on the top of the jig saw puzzle box lid when all the pieces fit just right. If we choose not to cooperate with his will, then pieces are missing or have to be left out.  But by believing him in faith, they allowed him to use their circumstances and create something with new life. Individually one could say they are stories of heartache. But together, when laid down side by side, inter-connected and fastened together with God's hand, they created a picture of the  mighty display of God's splendor for all to see.  God is the re-builder. He takes broken and shattered lives and rebuilds them for his glory. We have the choice any time to believe him or not.  His word says, "I know the plans I have for you; plans to prosper you and not to harm you but to give you a hope and future." Jer 29:11. I know in the moment each of these women had the choice as to whether to believe God; they were challenged to believe whether losing a child could produce hope. I can say this because I stood there right beside them.  However ,when you die to self and surrender to the risen Christ, he will bring you  back to life in a new way. Just like the acorn planted in the ground turns into a mighty oak, so the lives of these women and their children turned into an amazing testimony of hope. God promised these women in Isaiah 61...
"to bestow on them a crown of beauty
       instead of ashes,
       the oil of gladness
       instead of mourning,
       and a garment of praise
       instead of a spirit of despair.
       They will be called oaks of righteousness,
       a planting of the LORD
       for the display of his splendor."
I saw this come to fruition at the Run for New Life. Honestly, it took my breath away.

God laid down several other pieces for our first race. One was the inclusion of national Christian music artist Heather Williams. I had never envisioned that would be part of the puzzle, but God exceeded our imaginations. (Ephesians 3:20) Heather performed her single, "Hallelujah" written as a prayer after the death of her own son and I would say the song became our anthem for this year's race. God revealed her participation was both for us and for her and thankfully used me to speak that into her.



The finished picture was something like this....

The take home message of this particular blog is this: take heart, that when all you can see is a bunch of shattered pieces, God is at work. If you allow him, he will create something amazing. "And we know in all things God works for the good of those who love him and are called according to his purpose." Romans 8:28. That is so much more hopeful than searching for the caramel in a box of unlabeled chocolates!

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1.02.28

Don't Take the Bait

I've spent a lot of time this year blogging about how God and I tackled some life long insecurities; Praise God I have been set free from things that held me captive for a long time! Interestingly enough all the drama that went along with overcoming has been followed the last few months with a time of peace. This is in fact what God's word promises. The book of Isaiah, which not coincidentally I am now studying in 'Breaking Free', continually emphasizes God's promise of peace when His captives return wholeheartedly to the Lord. Isaiah 32:7 "The fruit of righteousness will be peace; the effect of righteousness will  be quietness and confidence forever." God's word promises and I can testify has delivered, that if you make a conscious turn in your life toward God, the end result will be peace, not drama. Isaiah 57:2 "Those who walk uprightly enter into peace." Why? Because the things that hurt my heart in the past no longer have the affect on my behavior they once did and therefore I myself become an instrument to peace.
So how do I maintain it? God is showing me the key is to not take the bait of offense. This is only logical that God would have me work on this; most of what offends us roots out of our own insecurities. I just finished reading the book, "The Bait of Satan". I highly recommend reading this; it was recommended by my pastor to our church. It has changed how I look at most of my daily interactions with people and helped me to realize how much Satan uses this tool. Once my eyes were opened to how frequently he tries to get us to swallow little morsels of offense on a daily basis, I couldn't help but remember the childhood story of Hansel and Gretel. Okay, stay with me! This is about to make sense.
If you remember Hansel and Gretel have legitimate fears, caused by their parents. Can I get an amen?! Because of their fears they wander in the forest and eventually stumble across a house made of candy, cake, and gingerbread. They gobble down all the delicious morsels only to eventually discover that the wicked homeowner has built the house to lure them inside into eventual captivity and their demise. Her intention is to fatten them up so she can ultimately devour them.
This is exactly what our enemy does. However, he baits us with a tiny morsel called "offense". Something happens, or someone says something and your thought it is...that offends me. Why? Because I have the right not to be treated that way. And you are probably right...you shouldn't have been treated that way. But this is where we have a choice...swallow or spit it out. Because if you take the bait of offense, that tiny bite will swell inside you into something far more dangerous to your faith...pride. Pride says, "You have the right to be both offended and to protect yourself." Pride causes us to not believe what God says is true in any situation. That is why insecurities that feed our offenses and affect our behavior towards others are really a lack of faith. If you really believe that God is in control in any situation, you won't feel like you need to protect your own rights. (Think of Joseph and his brothers) This is imperative because self protection ultimately leads to un-forgiveness. Put frankly, un-forgiveness hinders your spiritual growth. The bible is very clear about God withholding forgiveness to us when we refuse to forgive others.
Further, I will never achieve the abundant life God has in store for me if I harbor un-forgiveness in my heart. Why? Two very important reasons: 1) I won't be positioned to receive God's grace. If you read the fourth chapter of James, the author basically sums it up. We fight with each other because of the battles within our own hearts. God gives us the grace and tools needed to deal with others who are difficult because "God opposes the proud and gives grace to the humble." 2) Your love will grow cold. Have you ever been given the 'cold shoulder' by someone? This physical and emotional response is the direct result of being offended. This is what God's word says will happen as the return of Christ draws nearer. "Because of the increase of wickedness, the love of most will grow cold, but he who stands firm to the end will be saved." (Matt 24:11-13) Jesus was not talking about non-believers in this scripture. He was talking about the church! He didn't say a few, or many, or some. He said "the love of most"; that is a scary thought to me.  It is essential as Christians that we are constantly on guard to protect our hearts (Prov 4:23) so that our love does not grow cold; I've discovered vital to this is not taking the bait of offense. It might taste sweet on the lips, but ultimately it could be the death of your faith. Our enemy is very crafty. He knows what happens if he can get you to take the first bite. Un-forgiveness can lead to bitterness and hatred which ultimately will consume you. Hatred leads to revenge or taking things "into our own hands" because you don't think God is going to come through in this particular situation.  Not letting others offend you, keeps you in God's will.  If you allow yourself to become offended, you will ultimately be taken captive (just like Hansel and Gretel) by the enemy to fulfill his own purposes.
Now I didn't say this is easy! In fact it has been a daily challenge for me ever since I finished the book; there are particular people in my life who I could say offend me frequently or at least like to drop crumbs in my path.  Sometimes I've swallowed and had to exercise a little spiritual bulemia by repenting the morsel I injested; painful and not fulfilling! But Paul told us in the book of Acts that this will take a lot of practice to get it right. "And herein do I exercise myself, to have a conscience void of offense toward God, and toward men." For exercise to be of any value, especially as it pertains to godliness, it takes work. Maybe this period of peace I'm experiencing is actually some training for the next big race that God and I are getting ready to tackle.

Eat, Pray, Love

Unless you have been under a rock you have probably seen the hype concerning one of the latest movie releases, "Eat, Pray, Love." Julia Roberts lends her star power to this movie about a woman, Liz, who is discontented with life. She appears on the outside to have it all, but on the inside she is broken and empty. Her answer is to set out on a spiritual journey to find herself; she intends to take a year off, travel around the world, indulge her senses, and somehow in the process discover a more abundant life.  As an ancient proverb reminds us, "even a journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step." The real question to ask is...what path are you on? The path of self indulgence, that Liz chooses to take, will never meet our real needs for security, love, and purpose. "Like a city whose walls are broken down, is the man/woman who lacks self control." (Prov 25:28)
God has invited each one of us on a spiritual journey called... life. The answers to the questions we seek are not found within ourselves, but rather through relationship with Him. Ephesians 5 sums it up for us; "Be imitators of God, therefore, as dearly loved children, and live a life of love, as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us...no immoral, impure, or greedy person (such a person worships idols) will have any inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and of God. For you were once darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Live as children of light." Here is what God's spiritual Journey looks like; and, I promise you, the final destination is worth it.
1. EAT- Psalm 34:8 Taste and see that the Lord is good; blessed is the man who takes refuge in him.
Although I do humor at the 'Liz's' tag-line, "I'm having a no-carb-left-behind experience", gluttony usually produces pain and the inability to wear our skinny jeans. God says taste what I am all about, and you will never be hungry or lack again. An invitation to this King's table is more than just about food. It's about being healed from our hurts, scars and the things in life that cripple us and then being blessed with fellowship and communion. "He is wooing you from the jaws of distress, to a spacious place free from restriction, to the comfort of your table laden with choice food." (Job 36:15-16) One of the best examples in the Bible is the story of Mephibosheth. He was crippled in both feet; lame as the result of injuries. The wounds the world had inflicted caused him not only be treated but to feel unworthy of any respect. Most of all he despised himself. He was empty on the inside; sound like our movie protagonist? When invited to sit at King David's table he asked, "What is your servant that you should notice a dead dog like me?" But for kindness sake he was allowed to eat at the King's table every day for the rest of his life, just like he was family. God does the same for you and I; when we finally get to reside in his house, where he has many rooms (John 14:2), Jesus has prepared a place for you at the greatest banquet you can imagine. Just taste...you'll see.

2. PRAY Ephesians 2:3-5 All of us..gratifying our sinful nature and following its desires and thoughts...But because of his great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in our transgressions-it is by grace you have been saved.
The next step in a personal journey with God is getting to know Him. To develop any relationship, you have to spend time with a person. God says, if you seek Him, you will find him. And when you find Him what you will realize is that he wants relationship with you; he wants your heart. Relationship with God isn't about always doing the right thing or being perfect. If we as humans could achieve perfection, God wouldn't have needed to send his Son. Here is the problem with karma...there is no concept of forgiveness; your slate can never be wiped clean. And because no matter how hard you try (which in itself is exhausting) we are not perfect (holy) and can never achieve it on our own. Why? Because the measuring stick of your goodness is not your neighbor...it is God's son, Jesus. The rest of the same passage in Ephesians reads,"For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith-and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God-not by works, so that no one can boast." Grace is unmerited favor from God. Once I grasped, through relationship with God (which is what prayer really is), what He did for me personally by sending his son Jesus, I couldn't  help but live the thing out. I am on planet Earth for a purpose and I am most fulfilled when living smack dab in the middle of that calling from God. "For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do." (Ephesians 2:10)

3. LOVE: 1st Corinth 13:2 If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing.
You can't love people if you first don't fully know the love of God. Once you fully comprehend God's grace for you, it is much easier to grace others. This is where many of us, including myself fall short. We compare God's love to the love we have received from people in our life; there is no comparison. God's love for you is measureless! (Ephesians 3) In the Bible, God is pretty darn meticulous when it comes to measurements. He loves numbers. But in regard to you, there is no limit. His love is patient, kind, not proud, not self-seeking, not easily angered, keeps no record of wrongs. It protects, trusts, hopes and perseveres.  God's word tells us, "whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love." What this word means, is that if you and I really understood the full measure of God's love for you (_your name here__) personally, your cup would be so overflowing that none of us would have to take a trip around the world to get it full. We wouldn't walk around all day with our proverbial cups out asking to be filled by others; we wouldn't need it to be filled by others. That would be worth the trip for me right there!  When your love cup is full, you can love the un-loveable. When your love cup is full, you can extend grace to people who don't deserve it. The bottom line is this...love is the ONLY feeling that God calls us to act upon. Stop here and meditate on this one for a minute. No other emotion does God ask you to take into your own hands...not anger, not jealousy, not fear, not boredom, and definitely not purposelessness. God's kind of love is an action, not a feeling. "For God so loved the world that He sent his one and only Son that whoever believes in him will not perish but have everlasting life." (John 3:16)
Each one of us is on a spiritual journey. It begins with a single step. What path are you on? God is calling you to an abundant life in relationship with him that manifests itself in a calling that will love others into his kingdom and gain them a place at the banquet table. "You are called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the sinful nature; rather serve one another in love." (Galations 5:13) Go ahead, eat, pray, love.

So What Does 40 Look Like?

Today is my 40th birthday. Not quite as emotional as 30 was for some reason, but significant nonetheless. I've had several people comment when I told them this birthday I was turning the big 4-0, "You definitely don't look like you're 40." Which caused me to start thinking, "What does 40 look like?" Now don't get me wrong! I thoroughly enjoy being told that I still have a youthful appearance. This is especially in light of the fact that all my beauty efforts are now designed towards maintenance rather than necessarily achieving. Reflecting on this past year makes those efforts seem kind of comical. Why? Because I asked myself, "Instead of taking a worldly view, let's ask 'What does 40 look like to God?'. This past year has shown me emphatically that God is not concerned at all with maintenance. "See I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland." Isaiah 43:19
1. What about 40?
Our God is very concerned with numbers. They have great significance to him and therefore He is very deliberate in his use of them. Forty is generally considered the number that signifies a time of trial, testing, and preparation that is followed by restoration and blessing. The Israelites wandered in the desert for 40 years as a consequence of their own disbelief in God. "Remember how the LORD your God led you all the way in the desert these forty years, to humble you and to test you in order to know what was in your heart, whether or not you would keep his commands. He humbled you, causing you to hunger and then feeding you with manna, which neither you nor your fathers had known, to teach you that man does not live on bread alone but on every word that comes from the mouth of the LORD." (Deut 8:1-3)
This year I learned through Beth Moore's 'So Long Insecurity' that my insecurities are really a lack of faith. Through God's help I have been able to let go of some life long ones. I'm testifying to the Grace of God that I can honestly say that things that hurt my heart and therefore caused me to act foolish for 40 years no longer have that affect on me. That is huge. Why this took 40 years is the mystery of God's omniscience. Several years ago I asked God to give me a 'verse' each January for the next year of my life; I make a scrapbook page in January with a picture of myself for that year. This year my verse was Revelation 3:7-8. "I am the one who is holy and true. I hold the keys that belonged to David. When I open a door, no one can close it. And when I close a door, no one can open it. Listen to what I say. I know everything you have done and I have placed before you an open door that no one can close."  My vow for 2010 was: "Expect God to do something unprecedented in 2010: He will open doors in my life and I will be obedient to walk through them and put my feet on the land given to me." And then I added Isaiah 43:18-19 (Forget the former things; do not dwell in the past. I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?)  I had no idea back in January what God was getting ready to do! We were getting ready to walk out of my wilderness; my struggles in the early part of 2010 were "making a way in the desert and streams in my wasteland." I needed all of this to be ready for what God has planned next in my life.
2. Wisdom over knowledge.
When I was younger proving how smart I was to everyone around me was vital. Vital to what you ask? My self worth. My accolades were like trophies in the thought closet of my heart. Graduated high school at 16. Started medical school at 19 yo and youngest in her entire class. Graduated medical school at 22 yo with honors. Top of her residency class. Chairman of Junior Fellows for Air Force section of ACOG. Flight commander for Eglin Ob/Gyn. I valued both my appearance and intelligence and often used the latter as a weapon. My son Ben recently told me an American Indian proverb. "Gain wisdom not knowledge, for knowledge is of the past, but wisdom is of the future." The bible states it like this, "The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom. All who follow his precepts have good understanding." (Prov 111:10) I had no idea when I was younger that what I valued actually made me a fool and kept me stuck in my past. "We know that all possess knowledge. Knowledge puffs up, but love builds up." (1st Corin 8:1) To God, love is everything. It's so amazing to me how he has completely turned around  what I value; seeking more knowledge of him is everything to me. Knowledge that is never meant to be used as a weapon or to puff up. "If I have the gift of prophecy, and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing." So today I welcome anything that strips away my former love of self knowledge, even if my pride suffers a little dent. In this past year, my 'knowledge' has been devalued more than I have ever experienced in my whole life. However, God has made it abundantly clear it is necessary for what the next ten years will hold. I trust him.  It may have taken 40 years of wandering, but God is not about maintaining the old. We're getting ready to do a new thing. Looking at my reflection (Proverbs 27:19),I see renewal not maintenance and I'm liking how 40 looks to God.

Don't Attract Trouble With Your Voice

I heard a really interesting message on controlling what we say as believers. There is power in the spoken word. So as believers we have to be keen to not only listening for the voice of our Shepherd among the many voices out there but also the sound of our own. Jesus told us in John 10 that He is our Shepherd and we are like sheep; we hear his voice and follow him. We are told that there will be false prophets...other voices in our lives, that are thieves and robbers. They will have all kinds of things to say about you, to you, and if you let them in...in you. They will shout you're not good enough, holy enough, changed enough... you fill in the blank, to ever be useful or treasured by God.  Whatever it is that has injured your heart in the past, they will echo it.  They seek only to steal, kill, and destroy. Steal what? Your joy. The crazy thing is that the very sounds of your voice can attract that kind of trouble. Matthew 7 tells us these false voices "come to you in sheep's clothing, but inwardly they are ferocious wolves." They attack the flock and scatter it. (John 10:12).
We don't have lots of wolves around these parts. We do have lots of coyotes though. Coyotes can be just as dangerous as wolves; I saw one in our neighborhood once chasing a fox. The fox got away...interestingly Jesus told us "I am sending you out like sheep among wolves. Therefore be as shrewd as snakes and as inoffensive as a dove." (Matt 10:16) Don't give the coyotes a reason to look your direction! I just learned about this one.  Foxes are known to be pretty cunning creatures; after the fox got away, that neighborhood coyote stood and stared directly at me. Fortunately I was with Greg, who encouraged me to keep walking briskly.
Coyote, as do most similar creatures, hunt in packs. A victim is chosen and the group works together to expose and prey on a perceived weakness. I have found this approach to be true of most of the 'voices' who will seek to steal your joy; it won't come from a lone attacker. Have you noticed how quickly a pack mentality forms around negative voices? How can you recognize the wolves? "By their fruit you will recognize them." Matt 7:16. They will lack love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, or self control.
If you want to hunt coyotes, guess what type of animal call you would use? The sound of an injured rabbit. Yep, that's right. An injured animal making sounds of distress attracts it predators. So let's draw an analogy between us as sheep and the wolves seeking to destroy us.
When something happens that injures our pride or our hearts, we have a choice regarding the words we choose to speak about it. I'm not suggesting not being able to verbalize your hurts; rather it is how we speak about them OUT LOUD  that makes all the difference. To God, cry out all your hurts. But to each other, we should offer voices of faith. When we don't, we are not a unified voice as believers and we allow the enemy into our flock. Doubt, dissension, gossip, bitterness...they focus on our injury and they attract wolves who will attack us and keep us separated. As believers we should speak about what God is going to do in our situation; a voice of Faith. We have to declare out loud what God's truth/his word speaks over our current situation. This was a good reminder for me. Don't underestimate the spoken word. God's words are sharper than any double edged sword...(Hebrews 4:12)...pretty good for scaring off coyotes.

Sonflowers

A small black seed placed in fertile soil

That is how be both began

Toiled and worked, but never forgotten

By the Grace of a heavenly hand

Slowly the crust of this dirt is broken

By a small and tender shoot

The Master Gardener fully at work

    Pulling weeds and thorns

  As we both grow under earthly foot.

 Aim for the Son

As you lift your up your face

Knowing you are only growing

By its provision and God's Grace

Those who drink daily of life-giving water

Are awash and renewed in their Spirit

They are the ones who will grow tall

Reaching high to the Son, as the ones who strive to be nearest

Oh Sunflower, my Sonflower

Your summer song is our life here before Heaven

By your growth I can glimpse a small part

I deduce as I survey your family lovingly around mine

That's why you bring such joy to my heart.

Wedding Plans

June is the month for weddings. I started thinking about this for several reasons. Many of my patients are involved in service industries that cater to destination weddings and this is generally one of the busiest times of year for them; thus, the oil spill disaster has the potential to take a toll on a number of local folks. It has the potential to stain or pollute preparations for many local beach weddings and severely impact overall. The second motivator for my train of thought was a comment made by my best friend as we reflected on sin, specifically sexual sin, and its pollution of today's world. She said, " Well we know from our studies, that God is using this time in purifying his bride."
June is the month for weddings. And did you know girls, as the Bride of Christ (which is the church of believers), we are supposed to be making preparations for our wedding?  It occurred to me that some of the struggles I am facing are part of God's purification process, but the preparations here on Earth are my responsibility.  Here are some of the ways God is speaking to me about making sure his Bride is ready when the day of his return arrives.

1.The first step is to know that you are supposed to making preparations.
I remember my wedding planning. I was very deliberate about it; I had a binder with all my contacts, clippings, and receipts. I gave attention to every detail. We were engaged for over a year and I remember that I grew weary of planning and at times wished we had just eloped.  In Matthew 25 Jesus gives us the parable of the ten virgins. The ten took their lamps and went out to meet their bridegroom; he was a long time in coming and they all grew tired of waiting and fell asleep. Five were foolish and the other five were wise. Only 5 of them took oil in jars with them. The lamps signify the fact that once you are saved in Christ, you are like a lamp. (Matt 5:15, Luke11:33, Rev 11:4). You are meant to be a light to shine in a dark world and your righteousness signifies this light. Are you a light? Do you stand out from those around you? Are you assured of your salvation...do you know one day you will meet your bridegroom? The oil signifies the Holy Spirit. Each day we are called to empty ourselves and be filled with the Spirit. This is a life long process of seeking God daily; you won't be able to do it at the last minute.  The Holy Spirit needs to be your constant companion.  Isaiah 61:10 "I delight greatly in the LORD; my soul rejoices in my God. For he has clothed me with garments of salvation and arrayed me in a robe of righteousness, as a bridegroom adorns his head like a priest, and as a bride adorns herself with her jewels." By seeking righteousness daily in your every day actions you will stand out in this world, like a bride adorned in shiny jewels. This kind of bling will get noticed!  God is looking for people who are the real deal; they are the same everywhere they go and in every situation. God works to eliminate insincerity and hypocrisy in your character; like a refiner heats up metal and skims off the impurities. Your job is cooperate. I bear the marks to prove it. But because this refinement in character takes time, you have to be ready. "But while they (the fools) were on their way to buy oil, the bridegroom arrived. The virgins who were ready went in with him to the wedding banquet. And the door was shut....Therefore keep watch, because you do not know the day or the hour."

2. Be passionate for your groom.
The day you get married is a day full of emotion for brides. Love breeds the willingness to commit to a life long journey together. My commitment to Jesus isn't about religion; it is a love relationship. I love him because He does for me what I could never do for myself. You aren't supposed to be lukewarm about your groom on your wedding day; if you are, the wedding may never occur or the marriage may never reach its intended potential. The same is true as we prepare for our spiritual wedding. The Bride of Christ should be passionate about her groom; God does not want luke-warm believers who are always straddling the fence between living out the life Christ has planned and the one the world offers. We should not have to water down God's word or remove Christ from the center of a message to entice people to believe.  God's word tells us in Revelation that churches who " are neither hot nor cold, who are lukewarm" in their deeds for Christ, are not palatable to God and "they will be spit out." People around you should be able to tell you have a passionate love relationship with Christ. How? Because your love has spurned you to commit your daily living to him even during the times you may not feel it. You do the right thing and know that the feelings will follow.

3. Be aware of the ways our enemy seeks to stain or tarnish the Bride of Christ.
 I believe that once you accept Christ as your Savior in your heart and confess it with your mouth wholeheartedly you are saved and sealed for the day of Redemption. The enemy therefore cannot take away your salvation. However, he can make you try and doubt it. If you doubt it, then you probably won't behave like you are saved. This is really what he is after. I believe he has and will do everything in his power to stain the Bride of Christ and tarnish her before her union with the Lamb. What better way to do this than with sexual sin? I have seen more infidelity and heard of more sexual immorality in the last several years than ever in my career. I'm not talking about non-believers here...I'm talking about church going, long time confessing believers. Why does the devil use sex? Because unlike other sin...it sticks. It will change you, it will tarnish you no matter what you want to believe at the time.  Kinda like oily, sludgy, tarballs. 1st Corinth 6:17-18 MSG "Since we want to become spiritually one with the Master, we must not pursue  the kind of sex that avoids commitment and  intimacy; the kind of sex that never can "become one"... There is a sense in which sexual sins are different from all others. In sexual sin we violate the sacredness of our own body."  What a challenge in this world to raise sexually pure children! Sometimes it feels impossible. For man it is..but with God's help and obedience to his will to refine his Bride, it is possible. I need to believe this as I try to raise two young men in this culture.
Greg and I just celebrated our 14th wedding anniversary. I was such a naive bride. However, I knew I loved Greg with all my heart and that it was God's plan for me to spend my life with him. I praise Him daily that He knew what has best for me and has used that union over time to make me more like Christ. A fore-taste of what God has planned for me!

A Friend to Run Along Side Me

Today was the Boggy Bayou Race in Valparaiso. It was very hot considering that our temperatures have been pretty mild and with the long cold winter we endured. I haven't run a race in 80 degree temps this year, but this morning was the first one for the season. My friend Michelle sent me a text the day before wishing me "God Speed". I don't get to see Michelle as much as I like because of our busy schedules and it had been quite some time since we had spoken. However her text really blessed my heart because it reminded me that she remembers the things that are important to me. When we go on long runs together, we often spend the time talking about all the things God is doing in our lives. We are human beings at times sharing the same path or race course as the case may be. But what blesses me most about Michelle is that she always treats me like a human being..not a human doing. She knows that God doesn't care about your career, He cares about your character. He doesn't care as much about what you are doing at any given time or place, but more about who you are becoming. Sometimes I feel like a lot of the people I know define me solely by my career. Don't get me wrong, I fully understand that being a doctor is a calling not just a job. The hours are not forgiving and often affect all other areas of my life. My family, my friendships, my church life, and my interests have all had to take second place at one time or another because of my career. But I have felt that I don't get included, invited or "remembered" at times because of it; this is a challenge in regard to the work God has done on my insecurities.  Can God's calling on your life cause you to feel excluded, isolated, or lonely? Yep.  In reality this is just one part of who I am so I praise God daily for the very few ladies I call best friends who understand this.

So back to Michelle. She remembered.  She came and ran with me, and when the heat was unforgiving she jogged in place so we could cross the finish line together. That is the kind of woman I am privileged to call friend.

300,000 Women Said So Long Insecurity and I was ONE of them

Today was the culmination of a journey I've been taking with God the last few months. Today was the live simulcast for "So Long Insecurity."  I read the book by Beth Moore entitled, "So Long Insecurity"...you've been a bad friend to us. It was life changing. Studying what the scripture says about my security in Christ along with wrestling the thing out with my best friend and accountability partner has proved monumental in my faith walk. I didn't even know how much I was a slave to it until God made it evident...then I saw it everywhere I went. Once God has shown you the grace to set you free from bondage, you suddenly have mercy for those around you who act the same way. This wasn't just another bible study with a pithy message...it was transforming. I am not the same person I was before, I am a new creation in Christ...the old is gone, the new has come. (2nd Corinth 5:17). I was a greeter at today's event. While standing at the door welcoming the over 900 women in our town (out of 300,000 nationwide) who attended, I was overwhelmed. When I thought about how God had worked in my own life and what he could do for all the women attending nationwide worshiping Him together, I got choked up. Then I thought, "Get it together girl!, you can't be a greeter standing in the doorway and crying." But I know today blessed God's heart and it definitely blessed mine.
TODAY this new woman plans to be SECURE; it is the only way to fulfill my calling. Now Beth always tells us that the battlefield is the mind and to be secure will only happen with intention. So daily I have to take off the old, and put on the new. This will help me to act secure even when I don't feel like it; then the actions will produce feelings. It is not the other way around. If you wait to act secure until you feel it first...you never will be. We don't live in a world like that. Besides you have an enemy who does not want you to walk in the truth of your foundation in Christ. Today we learned that a SECURE woman is 6 things:

1. S : She is saved from herself. Not by herself, nor for herself, but saved from herself. Trust me when I tell you I have been my own worst enemy on numerous occasions and girl have I acted the fool. I needed a Savior to save me from myself...that pretty much sums up why I turned my life over to Christ. It wasn't working so well when I was running the show.
2 E: Entitled to Truth. We learned the farther you live away from Christ the more deceptive your thinking becomes and this hardens your heart. In a world that grows darker and brings more and more deception I need to stay connected to the truth; this is God's word. I need to know it....by heart.
3. C Clothed With Intention  As a woman, you don't get dressed by accident and you certainly won't be secure by accident. You have to "clothe yourself with dignity and strength"; insecurity wants to take your dignity. I am determined not to let that happen...anymore.
4. U  Upended by Grace  Beth taught us that if we really were convinced that we were forgiven...and believed it..we would not withhold grace from others. Most of our un-forgiveness and what we view as offenses root from our insecurities. If you want to be secure, you have to practice forgiveness. Ephesians 4:32..we have to grace others just like Christ graced us.
5. R Rebounded by Love. I can never really be a secure woman until I fully accept that I am completely and unfailingly loved by God. Everyone has the need to know there is someone who will unfailingly love them and will not leave them. Beth told us that insecurity is not a weakness....it is unbelief. I realized this is the one area I am still struggling. I know God loves me, but I'm pretty sure I don't know it with the confidence I need to. If I did, I wouldn't be needing others to love me to meet my needs of security or depend on others to make me feel good about myself. Lord, I do believe you love me,  help with me with my unbelief.(Mark 9:23-24) When it comes to God, it always comes back to love.
6. E Exceptional in Life. We all have a need for significance...to matter. God has shown me during this last week through a wonderful illustration that you will never matter more or be more exceptional than when you are fully executing your spiritual gift. A secure woman in this culture stands out...she is exceptional. I want that. "As each one has received a gift, minister it to one another, as good stewards of the manifold grace of God." Manifold in the original language means multicolored. When God gives you your spiritual gift it is like he clothes you with a multicolored coat that shows the world you are his "most loved and highly favored child." This is exactly like what Jacob did for Joseph. God showed me this week that when I am 'wearing' my gift, I am really being 'clothed in the strength and dignity' that the world and my own insecurities would choose to rob me of. My worth comes from God's manifold grace flowing through me, not from anything or anyone else. This so touched my heart.
If you haven't read this book, I cannot recommend it any more highly. What a journey. What a day. Lord you are such a wild ride.

Resurrection Run Weekend

Last weekend was a wonderful Spring weekend. The weather was great and everyone I saw in the office on Monday had a pink skinned glow to them.
Last weekend was the Resurrection Run at Village Baptist. I ran the 10K..a little slow for me I shamefully admit. Here are my list of excuses...1. A headwind..the run is a long the beach and you have to fight the wind every time. 2. My body was tired from working fairly hard. 3. Mentally I have been challenged by events at work. Running is both mental and physical and I'm working so hard on some challenges in the battlefield of the mind that my enemy keeps testing me there. Ok, I'm done with lame excuses. This photo was after I finished the race.

On Sunday we went to Bellingrath Gardens in Mobile to take family photos w/ the Azaleas in bloom and we ate at Lamberts Cafe..."Home of the Throwed Roll." Ok, eating there did not help my cause of improving my running time, but oh it was so good. After our feast, I have vowed to give up bread for a while, so maybe this will help improve the pace. But as for the pace of the rest of my life, I'm still feasting daily on the Bread of Life, Jesus. I consider it carbo loading for the daily grind. 

Standing in the Door of the Tomb

As we approach Easter and everything that it symbolizes to Christians, God has consistently had me wrapping my mind around its interesting dichotomy. You see, there really are two parts to Easter that we remember each year. The first and probably most obvious, even to non-Christians, is that Christ died for us on the Cross. In the old testament God taught his people the concept that to atone for sin there had to be a sacrifice with the shedding of blood on the altar to God. This physical concept laid the foundation for what he would want us to accomplish in our hearts after the new Covenant. After Jesus came, we no longer have to kill sheep, birds, or rams in order to be forgiven by God. He was the only sacrifice that could take away all the sins of the world. He died for you and for me, even before we chose to accept his gift.  "But God demonstrates his own love for us in this; while we were still sinners Christ died for us." (Romans 5:8) When an individual really comprehends this and the fact there is nothing we can do on our own to be saved, most turn their life over to Christ. Even though we don't have to make sacrifices anymore, God does require us to participate in his death. Col 3:3 (For you died, and now your life is hidden in Christ); Rom 12:1 (Therefore I urge you brothers in view of God's mercy to present yourself as living sacrifices,holy and pleasing to God, this is your spiritual act of worship). This means that everyday we die to self. The problem with living sacrifices is that they try to climb off the altar. It takes daily submission of our will to God's will for your life.  This is the point in which I think most Christians get stuck. I'll call them and myself, "Zombie Christians". We walk around life as the living dead. The world looks at us as we say, "See, I'm dying to self...I'm denying myself and taking up my cross for Christ." To a non-Christian who hasn't comprehended what Christ's sacrifice was all about, this is not very attractive.
God does not want us stuck in the door of the tomb. If all we needed for life was for Christ to die, God would have left it that way. But he didn't; the tomb is empty because Christ was resurrected...he is alive and this is the way God wants us to live. He has made available to us the same power that brought Christ back from the grave. As soon as you or I accept Christ, we have that power available to us. You know what? I WANT IT! " I want to know Christ and the power of his resurrection and the fellowship of sharing in his sufferings, becoming like him in his death, and so somehow, to attain the resurrection from the dead." Phillipians 3:9-11. I'm not simply talking about eternal life and living with Christ forever. I already have that. I'm talking about fears, insecurities, and daily life struggles.  I don't just want to daily put those things on God's altar as they continue to cause me pain; I want to be transformed by the renewing of my mind. I'm wanting God to make them non-issues for me. This only happens if I am willing to step out of the tomb. I am wanting the next time I experience rejection or the feelings of insignificance, they don't even affect me like they once did. Why? Because I live with resurrection confidence. If my God is for me, then who can be against me? The enemy thought he had won when God's son was killed; he didn't know the second half of the story. Imagine what life could be like if we all fully comprehended the power of the resurrection and actually lived that way.

No Matter How Long the Winter, Spring is Sure to Follow

fairy house------- Fairy garden in my yard------Tink's corner----- Tink's house (handmade)

I'm so glad Spring has finally arrived. It has been a very long and cold winter. But with the warmer temperatures, has come a new phase in my walk with God. We've been working on some pretty heavy topics like fears, insecurities, and dignity. I'm so excited to take off the heavy cloak of insecurity and step out into the what the Son has waiting for me...bring on the rebirth of Spring.

" I would love Spring anywhere, but if I could choose I would greet it in a garden." -Ruth Stout

I recently went to Walt Disney World (one of my favorite places to visit) and it was the Flower and Garden Festival at Epcot. They had a Fairy Garden there that was beautiful. The picture taken of me is in the garden with a topiary fairy behind me. I decided to re-create a fairy garden in my own back yard. Why? Because it makes me happy. Reason enough. Here is our version that was completed this weekend. We have flowers including lavender, posies, and begonias. We have herbs including rosemary, sage, and mint. There is a Tinkerbell bird bath, gazing ball and hummingbird feeder. We made two fairy houses for our garden; the teapot is a replica of her house we saw at Disney...pretty darn cute if I do say so myself!
It was fun to welcome Spring with my new garden. Besides, one can never have too much faith, trust, and....well you know the rest.